Tim Spencer

Serve. Grow. Lead.

From Self-Reliance to God-Reliance

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handsThink about the ways that being independent gets sewn into your life. It happens in school from the first day you go to Kindergarten. It happens in business as you learn to promote yourself and advance your career. It happens as you move away from home and take responsibility for things your parents used to do for you.

But after all those lessons in becoming independent, you have to live in the opposite direction. For most of us, the first big lesson happens in marriage. We discover the limits of self-reliance and the beauty of a collaborative, loving relationship with someone else.

But the greatest lesson in dependent living is the one we learn as a child of God. Jesus said:

I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. – John 15:5 (NIV)

Abiding in Christ means that you depend on Him in every corner of your life. That happens most readily through prayer. Bill Hybels said it this way:

From birth we have been learning the rules of self-reliance as we strain and struggle to achieve self-sufficiency. Prayer flies in the face of those deep-seated values. It is an assault on human autonomy, an indictment of independent living. To people in the fast lane, determined to make it on their own, prayer is an embarrassing interruption.

Interruption or not, prayer is the indispensable ingredient in any relationship with a communicating God. Without it, the faith relationship breaks down and your independence asserts itself once more. To break the chains of self-reliance and self-sufficiency:

  1. Start your day with prayer. Confess your sins before God and commit to an attitude of worship and Spirit-sensitivity throughout the day. Taking that simple step at the start helps build a supernatural perspective for the daily grind.
  2. Live with God-reliance vs. self-reliance. Approach your daily routine with healthy skepticism about old habits and tendencies. Ask key questions to keep the proper perspective for living a life on mission for God. Pray short prayers throughout the day, asking God to help in both the big and small things.
  3. Consider the source of every decision you make. Are you making decisions with human wisdom, knowledge and motivation, or is a supernatural God transforming and directing your life? Remember that prayer and meditation is not an interruption, it’s at the heart of your relationship with a communicating God.
  4. Acknowledge your inadequacy at every turn. Demonstrate humility and servant leadership, remembering that God is holy and you are not. Believers are not meant to operate independently from the sustaining presence of their God. Your humble words and actions make that task a lot easier.

So what’s the Big Idea?

Live with God-reliance vs. self-reliance in every aspect of your life. The key is regular communication with God in the big and small things of life. That unnatural activity pushes self-reliance to the side and leads you to embrace total dependence on an eternally faithful God.

Resources


Source

Bill Hybels, Too Busy Not to Pray: Slowing Down to Be with God (10th Anniversary Edition, Revised and Expanded), 2nd ed. (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1998), 9.

Like Father, Like Son

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fatherThere are so many things about my father I want to emulate. He was kind, caring, honest and godly, character traits that inspire me to be a better man and father in my own right.

It’s amazing how easily I subconsciously appropriated his character and nature. In both good and bad ways, I am my father’s son. And I can see the same process unfolding in my own children. They are like me in both good and bad ways.

The transfer from fathers to sons is more than genetic, of course. It includes emotional, intellectual, social, spiritual and intensely personal things. I can hope or wish that the transfer won’t happen with my bad habits and attitudes, but it’s unavoidable. Long after I’m gone, my “like father, like son” legacy will remain.

From an early age, children learn from observation, experience and social interaction with their parents. They learn how to treat others with respect, or not. They learn how to act with integrity, or not. They learn how to worship and pray, or not.

My one hope is Jesus—that he will take my life and transform it supernaturally into Christ-likeness at every turn. While I often fail in my Christian walk, my sons have another Father who won’t. That’s the best “like Father, like son” legacy of all.

An old lyric says it this way:

Like Father, like son,
with arms outstretched and love for everyone.
My highest praise will be,
that someone can say of me,
like Father, like son.

Guard your sons and teach them to be more like their spiritual Father. Introduce them to Jesus and encourage them to grow in their faith and their faithfulness to God.

You’ve likely heard that kids need to hear at least 3 things from their parents on a regular basis. This is especially true in father-son relationships. They need to hear you say:

  1. “I love you.”
  2. “I’m proud of you.” (be especially proud of their spiritual growth)
  3. “You’re good at…” (affirm their godly words and actions and encourage them to understand and use their spiritual gifts)

So what’s the Big Idea?

Fathers, tell your sons that you love them and affirm their spiritual growth. Helping them become more like their spiritual Father is the best “like Father, like son” legacy of all.

Resources


Source

Dorothy Hausch, Joe Huffman, John Randolph Cox, and Reid Hausch, “Like Father, Like Son,” Makin’ It Matter by Truth, Benson Records, 1987.

Make Prayer Part of Your Daily Routine

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routineIs prayer “missing in action” in your personal routine, family or church? I’m ashamed to admit that prayer falls to the bottom of my agenda far too often. Priorities and the tyranny of the urgent are the culprit, but there’s more to it than making easy excuses.

I’m compelled to ask myself whether or not I really believe in prayer. Do I faithfully expect that God will take my work and multiply it in the prayers I offer? Or do I have lowered expectations for the work God wants to do in and through me?

Spiritual issues and problems require supernatural solutions, and that’s where regular prayer becomes important. Prayer leads me to evaluate my priorities, decisions, motives and attitudes. It impacts my heart and mind, making me a more effective leader and servant.

Bill Hybels describes this “supernatural walk with a living, dynamic, communicating God” this way:

Authentic Christians are persons who stand apart from others, even other Christians, as though listening to a different drummer. Their character seems deeper, their ideas fresher, their spirit softer, their courage greater, their leadership stronger, their concerns wider, their compassion more genuine and their convictions more concrete.

I want that kind of power and conviction in my life, family and church. Perhaps you do too. If so, ask yourself some key questions about prayer:

  1. Where does prayer rate in your daily schedule?
  2. Does your family pray together regularly?
  3. Is prayer valued in your church or organization?
  4. How can you develop more effective prayer habits?

On that last point, let me offer a prayer model from Dr. Greg Frizzell, Prayer and Spiritual Awakening Specialist with the Oklahoma Baptist Convention. Based on The Lord’s Prayer, our most important biblical model, Dr. Frizzell’s PRISM acrostic is a powerful way to pray every day:

P = Praise
R = Repentance
I = Intercession (about spiritual things and for spiritual protection and deliverance)
S = Supplication (petition)
M = Meditation on the Word (listening for lessons in Scripture)

So what’s the Big Idea?

Make prayer part of your daily routine for greater effectiveness in every area of your life. Expand that principle to your family and church to appropriate divine power for living the everyday mission of God. Most of all, believe in the power of prayer.

Resources


Sources

Bill Hybels, Too Busy Not to Pray: Slowing Down to Be with God (10th Anniversary Edition, Revised and Expanded), 2nd ed. (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1998), 125.

Greg Frizzell, PRISM Prayer Model, January 19, 2015.